Turnabout Assumptions
by bobandbill
Summary: It involves Miles Edgeworth being hit in the face with a fish. This is all you need to know.


This story came about from a fundraiser on livejournal - general gist was people wrote at a rate (e.g $1 = 100 words), people bidded to choose what was written and all money bidded went to the Queensland flood relief. GOOD CAUSE. My bidder wanted an FF fic so here is my version - funnily enough the first non-Pokemon/original piece of writing.

Credit to An-chan for the title and proof-reading it!

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**Turnabout Assumptions  
**

The judge hammered his gavel to quieten the audience, the sound reverberating around the room and gradually grabbing the attention of each person present. All looked at the elderly man except for Pearl, the small, dainty child opting instead to stare at the back of Phoenix's head in silent anger.

_You should be ashamed of yourself! _she thought angrily.

"The court is back in session to continue the case, in which one Mr. Phillar Caractor has accused Mr. Gil Tee of stealing his gorilla costume and attempting to rob the bank under his identity, while injuring two members of the police force with a novelty-sized spoon."

_Why would you not give more attention to Mystic Maya!_

"It was for the good of the nation! I regret nothing!" shouted the defendant from his position in the defendant's chair. Phoenix Wright, his defence lawyer, motioned to his client to keep quiet before sighing to himself, scratching his spiky hair in annoyance as he gazed at his notes. He only took on cases when he believed the defendant was not guilty, but it seemed every new case was getting either harder to solve or stupider in nature than the previous, and this seemed to be a combination of the two.

"Pearl, could you stop staring at me, please?" he pleaded to the young girl who stood beside him, as he tried to ignore her piercing eyes and instead focused on his well-known opponent in Miles Edgeworth, dressed up as usual in his ridiculously extravagant outfit. His request went ignored – the medium-in-training was too intent in making her feelings known. Sighing once again, he decided to talk to her again after the trial and tried to focus his mind on the task at hand as the cross-examination recommenced – overcoming his opponent in the old battle of wits and logic to prove his defendant's innocence.

_I'll never forgive him!_ Pearl thought, tugging at her necklace in frustration at the man. _He should treat Mystic Maya with far more respect!_ she continued to herself, as she lightly kicked Phoenix in the shin for good measure during the trial proceedings. She mulled yesterday's events to herself as she ignored his grimace of pain. The judge mistook his reaction as an expression of boredom and threatened to throw his gravel at him, while Edgeworth smirked at the unfortunate lawyer.

_All she wanted was to go out to the burger joint, and yet he refused! What kind of man is he to reject her request! I'll never talk to him again!_"Hmm, where did I put that piece of evidence...?" the lawyer suddenly murmured, searching his pockets.

"Oh, maybe it's this!" Pearl said as she handed him a large trout. She was unsure why Phoenix had insisted that it was evidence, but he had seemed pretty adamant about it the day before.

"Thank you," Phoenix replied, before slapping the counter with it loudly and then pointing the large fish at his opposition.

"OBJECTION!" he cried loudly. However, all Phoenix managed to do was lose his grip on the animal, the trout flying through the air and hitting Edgeworth right in the face.

Pearl grinned to herself – she never really understood the way the courtroom worked, but she knew that if the crowd shouted loudly after Phoenix did something it usually meant he did that something well. She grinned, before mentally slapping herself. _So much for not talking to him!_

The nine-year-old girl continued to muse to herself as Phoenix hurried over to make sure Edgeworth wasn't badly hurt. _But maybe...maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Phoenix isn't Maya's 'special someone'...after all, they both insist on denying that! That, and I never see any Psych Locks when they do so..._

"Sorry, Edgy, I didn't mean to throw that..." Phoenix mumbled, feeling himself glow red with embarrassment. _Well this is a first,_ he berated himself.

"Mr Wright, I will not tolerate the throwing of evidence in my courtroom! Maybe Godot and his cups of coffee were allowed, I'll admit, but I draw the line at trout!" the judge shouted, banging his gravel loudly. "I hate fish," he added with a stern frown.

_He doesn't ever stare at her like real lovers should! But if so, then who does he like? All adults should like someone!_

"Great, this suit is ruined forever now!" Edgeworth lamented as Phoenix tried to remove the fish, only for it to flop out of his hands and on top of Edgeworth's head.

"Why is it still ALIVE!"

"GET IT OFF!"

_But wait... _Pearl thought, looking across the courtroom now. _I do know he always stares at him in court! And he's always talking about him after the trials! And his cheeks... red!_

"AHA!" Pearl shouted suddenly, grinning at the commotion around the prosecutor's bench. All shouting ceased as everyone looked at the little girl who made her way to the middle of the room.

"It's okay, I understand now why you're not in love with Mystic Maya," she said, petting Phoenix on the head before winking at Edgeworth. "He's pretty cute!" Bemused, they watched her prance out of the courtroom singing happily to herself.

"Did she..." Phoenix began eventually as he face-palmed himself, breaking the silence of the courtroom.

"Can my day get any worse?" Edgeworth moaned, before glancing down at the notes on his desk now strongly reeking of fish and noticing who the next witness was going to be. "Yes, Oldbag to boot, I should have known..."

"Order! Order!" shouted the judge in vain to Pearl. "I demand answers! Are you the guilty one!" His shouting had no effect though – she had already exited the room.

Besides, now that she thought about it, she had to go and find Gumshoe to tell him he had competition.


End file.
